Let it Rip!

To keep up my license, I have to attend Continuing Education classes regularly. A few months ago I was so excited to attend a training entitled "Psychic Events in the Lives of Clients and Clinicians". I was intrigued immediately. A seminar about psychic events would surely hold my attention longer than, "How to Work with Difficult People" or "How to Help your Client Understand Her Feelings". I was stoked!

When I walked into the training I immediately felt the familiar distance in age with the other participants. Other than examples from paranormal psychology, this lecture was spiritually based. The speaker noted that most who are interested in this subject are women in their mid forties and above. I don't quite understand the logic behind that, but having been referred to as an "old soul" in the past, I felt at ease with the description.

I was soaking up every bit of this lecture. I was inspired! I was learning! I was on the corner of my seat in the first row not missing a beat in the over crowded classroom. After our lunch break, the presenter informed us that she was going to lead us in a meditation before moving forward with the rest of the material.

We were asked to stand. This must have been a popular training, because I could barely move my arms without bumping into my neighbors. I listened intently and followed every move instructed by the leader. Eyes closed, deep breathing, erasing the mind.

"Imagine space all around you. Ahead of you, behind you, below you and above you there is an infinite amount of space." The speaker's hypnotic voice continued, "There is only you in this room. You are relaxed."

I was really into this meditation, feeling peaceful and energized all at the same time.

"Every muscle is loose and you are free of expectations, judgements and...."

At that very moment, my relaxed stomach muscles decided to release the gasses stored up from lunch in a very loud and intrusive way.

How can I make this more clearer?

In a room with my colleagues, whom I would prefer to respect me, I tainted the air, disturbed the silence and took them out of their peaceful trance with a loud flatulence.

To put it bluntly, I farted.

Here people were in serenity, imagining their perfect place, and there I go stinking up the whole fairy tale land.

There was no cat to blame, not even a child I could look to and snicker. I would have just assumed to be striped naked and asked to karaoke "The Electric Slide" in front of these intelligent people than to loudly and disrespectfully declare my lunch right there in the middle of the seminar!!!!!

I was mortified, I was disgusted, I was so afraid to open my eyes!!

There were some giggles, but most attempted to be polite. My face was hot, my body frozen and the meditation was over. I had to face the stares.

And there she was, my neighbor, a sweet Italian lady in her late sixties. She was looking at me and giggling, stifling her laugh so that her shoulders shook. She patted me on the back with soft, dancing eyes. "You really let it rip!" I swear she had pride in her tone. She was not ridiculing, she was laughing with me. I began to chuckle. She called her daughter over. "Honey, did you hear her? This one was really feeling it!" At this point there were tears in the ladies eyes from laughter.

I couldn't help it, I began laughing uncontrollably. The more they laughed, I laughed. A moment ago I was ready to wish myself to Mars or leave the room in tears, one. Now I was laughing with my new found friends.

Later in the day we broke into small groups and this mother and daughter couple invited me to join. We had afternoon tea together on a break and shared stories about our families, traditions and cultures. I enjoyed these lighthearted women. I liked listening to them laugh and interact. At the end of the day we exchanged business cards and well wishes. The eldest whispered to me, "Honey, I am so happy you are able to laugh at yourself... it's the most important thing in life."

And they were gone. Out of my life. I am so thankful for these woman. They threw me an inter tube when I was sinking in a sea of embarrassment. They didn't ignore my faux-pas with judging eyes that said, "We know you did that awful thing, but we won't think to speak of it". Rather, they laughed and embraced my humanness. I went from feeling like and outcast to beaming with pride in my experience from the day.

Did you know that a healthy person farts on average 16 times a day? Mostly in his/her sleep. I looked it up before I began this post, only to reassure myself that it wasn't just me.

We are all only human. Embrace the fact that you are nothing more or less. When we are able to laugh at our flaws, we are truly living life to the fullest. Embrace others' imperfections with love. If we live in shame of those imperfections that define us as humans then we are unnaturally placing judgement on what our Higher Power deemed necessary for us.

Maybe that's a little deep for a blog about farting in a seminar.

To put it lightly, laugh at yourself and let it rip!