Moving honey or sucking blood?

November 19th, 2006:

"I am so stressed out about Christmas."

That was an excerpt from my journal last year. Thirty six days before Christmas and I was writing unevenly and quickly about how frustrated I was over what should be a very peaceful time. Through tears, I described how hard it was to make everyone happy. I went so far, that I even began a tirade about having nothing that looked good on me to wear to a Christmas party.

November 19th. It wasn't even Thanksgiving yet and I was all worked up over Christmas. The thing is that I only remember positive things from last year. I wonder what on Earth could have been so pressing that I actually allowed the stress to interrupt what should be a fun beginning to my favorite season.

So, looking back I should be reflecting on how much I have grown and matured, right? Hmm... I think it was just a few hours ago that I snapped at Shane and said I really needed a wish list ASAP. And if I am being really honest, I did pout in the closet this weekend about my perceived lack of an exciting wardrobe that flatters my ghostly pale skin.

What's wrong with me? Why do I stress over superficial things year after year during the season that defines love and sacrifice?

"It's not how busy you are,

but why you are busy.

The bee is praised;

the mosquito is swatted."
Marie O'Connor

This year I am going to try to be the bee and not the mosquito. I would much rather spread the sweet nectar of the holiday than suck the life out of time with family and celebrating Jesus' birth. Will you join me? Life is sweeter when you stop sucking.